I can’t imagine how that perfect complexion, flawless fat cheeks, that little chin and those dimples can remind anyone of me. He reminds me of God. Miracles, wonder, joy, pain (we lost 2 before he got here), innocence, vulnerability, unconditional love and HOPE.
I knew he was coming. I prayed about him often. I’ve made plans I may never get to fulfill. But I can hope. Before he was born they delivered two class II poles to my yard. Barry got me 2 additional ones. I began to plan. My office desk is littered with tree house… okay fort… ALRIGHT a zombie apocalypse tower, with zip line fast exit!!! I began to dream. Can’t wait to see him swing in a plastic seat like the one I used to take to the county lake and hang from a tree and fish while Loni Beth would swing. I wonder what his laugh will be like? His cry is pretty much on par with the raging thunderstorm personality of his tiny little mom. But I digress. He is so chill otherwise. Laid back and calm and serene like his dad…not his dad while dad is coaching but dad in his alter ego mild mannered Tyler Watkins.
Before he was born I made these plans and dreamed these dreams. If we ever get to do the things I’ve planned I’ll get to say, “Before I ever even knew your name Jonesie made this for you.” “Before you ever arrived I prepared for this very day.” “I started running again right after you came so I could chase you or run from you or carry you.” I want to be able to do anything he asks me to do.
I want to see the world through his new eyes. I want to wonder at his wonder when he finds new things to see, taste, hear, smell…when he finds his feet! I want to show him the real forest animals and not just the paintings I did for his nursery. I want to be with him when he sees a deer and a fox and an owl and a skunk and a chipmunk. I want to hear him sing Jesus loves me and watch the foolish man’s house go “splash” as Loni Beth use to sing it. I just want to be what a Grandfather is meant to be. I want to be a blessing. I want to be kind and gentle. I want him to think I’m strong, smart and gentle and wise. I want him to know how much I love his mom and dad, his grandmother Angie, grandfather Jerry, grandpa Rick and grandma Lisa and of course his grandmother “Jax”. I want Jax and Jonesie to be two of his favorite words. Those are my plans…
Before the foundation of the world. Before the creation of the world. (Ephesians 1:4; Matthew 25:34) Our Grand Father planned and designed and dreamed about a relationship with us. He wants to us to be redeemed, loved, forgiven, transformed, new and wonder filled. Not because of the new things He has made but because he has made us New. Those are His plans.